April 9th 09... the big night... the mark of a slight relief from the weight on my shoulders. 3 more weeks of torture and struggle before the tide changes in favour of myself and thus the battle shall be won from there on, i swear it.
I cant even say i slept last night, i napped. Slept in the first morning lecture and was high until evening. I blame the new magical vending machine that dispenses coffee with added cocaine and a button for 'less sugar'. Fascinating, seriously! Ask Galvin! lol. But anyway i still managed to finish a lab report. SIGH... Im way too exhausted to start with my next couple of assignments due...friday? F***!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It was a chilly yester-night, 4am, staring out the window and into the sleeping world. I remembered a close friend asking me this, "what is your purpose in life?" I continued to stare into the dark. Having absolutely no friggin clue until today. Be blur and let the wind push me around maybe? hmm... and dozed off.
Beyonce - Halo
Remember those walls I built
Well baby they're tumbling down
And they didn't even put up a fight
They didn't even make a sound
I found a way to let you in
But I never really had a doubt
Standing in the light of your halo
I got my angel now
It's like I've been awakened
Every rule I had you breakin'
It's the risk that I'm takin'
I ain't never gonna shut you out
Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away
I can feel your halo (halo) halo
I can see your halo (halo) halo
I can feel your halo (halo) halo
I can see your halo (halo) halo
Hit me like a ray of sun
Burning through my darkest night
You're the only one that I want
Think I'm addicted to your light
I swore I'd never fall again
But this don't even feel like falling
Gravity can't forget
To pull me to the ground again
Feels like I've been awakened
Every rule I had you breakin'
The risk that I'm takin'
I'm never gonna shut you out
Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away
I can feel your halo (halo) halo
I can see your halo (halo) halo
Repeats...
One word, Beautiful...
Monday, March 16, 2009
Monday, March 9, 2009
That uneasy feeling...
Negative energy hovers around me... Its the 2nd week of year 2 at monash, this week itself and until the end of the semester puts a temporary halt to a free and easy life. Weekly lab reports begin to pour in and assignments right around the corner. Performance for CnS week 2mrw, i am officially f***ed for that cuz im still unclear about the cha cha. The load of dance practice increases to about 3 times a week if i didnt hear wrongly. Oh and i just remembered that i agreed to work a little on sundays now yay! toooooot~ me!
I am so dead. I dont know how im going to cope. This is totally different from the holidays. But a challenge is a challenge no? Lets see how it goes...
I am so dead. I dont know how im going to cope. This is totally different from the holidays. But a challenge is a challenge no? Lets see how it goes...
Thursday, March 5, 2009
If you're unhappy about the way others have moulded you, get up and friggin mould yourself.
I came across a very powerful statement today while i picked up and browsed through a book.
Its not some funky statement with terror words and all but simple and straight to the point.
It goes like this:
"You can do it if you believe you can."
Its not my first time hearing or reading this of course. It just reminded me that self-motivation is by far the most crucial form of motivation yet. For me. Makes sense because if it doesnt begin in your mind, body and soul then where is it going to come from? A friend? possible... but what if this person doesnt have the time to attend to you? hmm?
Ever since the hols started, no, actually way before that if i think about it now, i've been squeezing out time to a self enhancement project. Not just fitness wise but building self-confidence, self-esteem and always trying to lead a cheerful life. Dancing is without a doubt one of the main factors for the contribution. Working at Starbucks, FnB line/customer care, initiating and engaging in convo with customers. Reading magazines and a few pages off books. Having to-die-for friends. All played a part. However, without the most important factor, YOU, the whole experiment is an utterly disgusting beyond failure.
Okay lets get this straight, im not boasting about how im so damn confident, think highly of myself and bla bla bla. All im saying is that is has helped me discover a much more happier and optimistic side of myself. And i believe that YOU are much better off than i am. Never give up.
-Smiling is contagious, when you smile, the World smiles back at you-
Im sleepy.....
So im back after what? A few months? lol i think i did forget at one point whether i had a blog or not... Anyway, cheers to a fantastic almost 4 months holiday! woo! And i am proud to say that i've made great use of this holiday. Ahem... let me break it down for you. So i began with a holiday to Malacca with my bunch of uni friends. Then i enrolled in friggin LAN subjects, 2 subjects to be precise. The course was about 2 months? Moving along, midway through my summer lan course i got a job at Starbucks Gardens (15th dec 08). On top of that i had dance classes at uni every thursday and on some occasions multiple times a week whenever a performance in nearing. Plus, i had to spend quality time with my friends aww... Oh not to forget collecting angpows for CNY all that visiting! Yeap, i definitely had something to do everyday, if not it was just work work and more work.
A quick update on my goals for the summer holidays of 2008 - 09:
1) Enroll and complete remaining LAN subjects. (Achieved. Past my M.S. and BKA baby!! so happy for myself)
2) Get a job at Starbucks. (Achieved. I thought it was impossible with my already busy schedule)
3) 60kg by March 09. (Failed. Hey i was well fed throughout the hols okay. Worked out a lot too but my metabolic rate you know... up to today i did put on 1kg sth)
4) Get a valentine. (Aborted with immediate effect :D postponed la)
Apparently sometime during the hols a couple of my close friends told me, "dont forget your friends!". I should've written this up a long time ago but i was busy. Well its not my fault that i couldnt make it for whatever outing they've planned. Simply because i had to prioritise. Other than that they just dont understand the fact that petrol is expensive and my parents dont subsidise whenever i use the car for my own leisure. Also bear in mind that i dont live nearby them. So? okay maybe its still my fault cuz there was this one time they were at mid valley, i was totally broke and exhausted. so i never made it. Sorry for that, but the rest you guys should understand.
A quick update on my goals for the summer holidays of 2008 - 09:
1) Enroll and complete remaining LAN subjects. (Achieved. Past my M.S. and BKA baby!! so happy for myself)
2) Get a job at Starbucks. (Achieved. I thought it was impossible with my already busy schedule)
3) 60kg by March 09. (Failed. Hey i was well fed throughout the hols okay. Worked out a lot too but my metabolic rate you know... up to today i did put on 1kg sth)
4) Get a valentine. (Aborted with immediate effect :D postponed la)
Apparently sometime during the hols a couple of my close friends told me, "dont forget your friends!". I should've written this up a long time ago but i was busy. Well its not my fault that i couldnt make it for whatever outing they've planned. Simply because i had to prioritise. Other than that they just dont understand the fact that petrol is expensive and my parents dont subsidise whenever i use the car for my own leisure. Also bear in mind that i dont live nearby them. So? okay maybe its still my fault cuz there was this one time they were at mid valley, i was totally broke and exhausted. so i never made it. Sorry for that, but the rest you guys should understand.
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